A Meeting’s Deep Care:
I was delighted to interview Elaine Graham, a member of Millville Monthly Meeting’s earlier Senior Concerns Committee, which is currently part of the meeting’s Spiritual Care Committee. The names of the committees both fit well with Elaine’s background as a nurse at Geisinger Health System in Danville, PA, and a professional educator who taught comunication courses. With care and communication as her background and with the support of members of the Senior Concerns Committee members including Dean Girton, Melanie Anderson, and Sandra Smith (now worshipping with Mountain View Monthly Meeting, Denver), programs and meeting guidelines regarding aging friends were developed.
The group had fun while reaching so many people. Before the pandemic, they held senior luncheons including topics such as creating a will, preparing advanced directives and learning about their Area Agency on Aging’s home and community-based services. The Senior Concerns Committee met for at least 15 years and identified the needs of Friends 55 and older and offered what they could for support. Specifically mentioned for their outreach and care of an aging friend were Ed Solenberger, Nancy Gale, and Mel Endy. Today, the Senior Concerns Committee has been absorbed into the Spiritual Care Committee with similar goals. Friends fulfill needs as they arose including grocery shopping, accompanying friends to medical appointments, visiting those in skilled nursing centers and providing intellectual conversations. The meeting has supported costs for such items as senior alert systems for those at risk of falls.
The meeting shared the list of their aging support initiatives — while Millville Monthly Meeting does not have an active Senior Concerns Committee at this time, in the past they have successfully undertaken the following activities aimed at senior membership and attenders. Senior support is currently coordinated by members of the Spiritual Care Committee and support persons.
- Recording of emergency contact information which also included condition specific particulars ie: diabetic, insulin dependent, physician’s name, emergency family contact filed at meetinghouse.
- Organized and paid for in-home emergency alert (Life Alert) for a home bound attender.
- Provided in-home meeting for worship.
- Offered support and visitation when hospitalized or home bound.
- Provided transportation to meeting for worship and events.
- As we worship on very old benches, we have acquired an ergonomic chair for anyone who may need it.
- Check-in calls for home bound friends
- Very successful Senior Luncheons have been held. Specific activities included wedding memories, elder care attorney presentation, family holiday traditions, trivia games with small, inexpensive door prizes, speakers from the Area Agency on Aging. These were very well attended.
- We now do regular ZOOM meeting for worship which is well attended by seniors who are hesitant to drive in winter or prefer to avoid crowds.
- During the COVID shutdown, we emailed an occasional “newsletter” updating friends on personal news. This was in addition to the regular meeting newsletter. The interesting thing was that when requests for news were sent out, it was our seniors who seemed most eager to reply. For example, one man wrote short stories about his experiences in the Navy. Brief book reviews were submitted, a recipe or two, etc. It was a short-lived but interesting project.
One story Elaine shared was about the family of Dick and Shirley Wenner. When Shirley was in her final stages of life, members of the meeting met with her and provided support to her and her family. The meeting brought worship to their home when Shirley was ill and it was truly meaningful to the family. Their daughter said, “It’s lovely to remember. Yes, the meeting was very loving and supportive while my mother was in her final days.”
A Life of Service: Dick Wenner, Millville Meeting
I followed up with Dick Wenner by Zoom to learn more about one of Millville’s treasures, and One Friends’ Legacy. Dick is pictured in the photo for this story, and today is a 96-year-old gentleman living at The Hickman senior living facility in West Chester. He was full of love, compassion for others, and is a humble person with a good sense of humor. His fondest memories shared were of his family’s farm in northcentral Pennsylvania. His own grandfather built the home, and a grandchild calls it their “forever home.” A theme resonating with Dick was the influence his parents gave to encourage him and his brother not to be farmers but to have another profession, and their strong belief in the value of education. At the same time, the rural life he lived became a centerpoint for his career.
Dick was raised in a family that attended the German Reformed Church (United Church of Christ) up the road from their farm; his father met his mother in church. After attending a one room schoolhouse and skipping two grades, following high school he entered the Navy Reserve as an officer in training. Dick went to Swarthmore College on a Navy scholarship and it was at the college that he learned about the Quakers. After WWII Dick went to the University of Pennsylvania to complete his Bachelor’s degree and a Masters in Governmental Administration at the Fells Institute of Government. It was a new program, and he was fortunate to gain entrance.
Dick’s professional career focused on giving service to communities, especially rural communities. His first job as Borough Manager of Clarks Summit, PA was a newly developed position. Dick later became Deputy Secretary for Agriculture for the State of Pennsylvania. In that role, he built a reputation for being a change agent and later joined the Office for Economic Opportunity with Sergeant Shriver in Washington DC. Dick became the voice advocating for those experiencing rural poverty and an advisor to Senator Robert F. Kennedy on this issue. In 1967 he was interviewed on an episode of CBS Radio’s ” Capitol Cloakroom,” during his work as executive director of the National Association For Community Development. The occasion coincided with the National Association For Community Development’s 2-day conference on Rural Poverty. The recording can be listened to here.
Throughout his career, Dick met and worked with significant historical figures including Senator Kennedy and Marian Wright Edelman, an activist for civil rights and children’s rights leading her to be the founder of the Children’s Defense Fund. Dick was the administrator who planned the historic trip to Mississippi in 1967 that was part of a Senate subcommittee’s examination of the War on Poverty programs. Dick’s work continued with those in poverty until he retired as the executive director of the Fund for an Open Society, a nonprofit housing organization in Philadelphia, in 1993.
Dick, Shirley, and their daughters Amanda and Melinda found a home in Quakerism. In the late 1970s, the family was part of the founding of Greenwood Friends School after they had joined Millville Meeting. Dick’s commitment to education led him to serve PYM on the Education Standing Committee and on the General Committee (Board of Trustees) of Westtown School. Supporting those in education influenced one daughter to become a teacher in Friends schools and marry a fellow Quaker educator. Now a granddaughter is teaching in a Friends school. Lifelong generational dedication to education is one of Dick’s legacies.
Dick’s work in service to communities also influenced his children and grandchildren. His son William is a judge and a grandson wrote his college essay about his grandparents’ farm and how much he loved the farm and taking walks with his grandfather when he was a young child. James and Dick would go out hand in hand on early morning walks around the farm, giving them a perfect opportunity for sharing. James shares that his desire to investigate issues like rural poverty in his own future work is because of his grandfather.
It was a joy meeting with Dick, and listening to his deep care for family and Quaker community.
Sharing Dick’s story was influenced by a pamphlet on Celebrating Lives and Life Stories | Quaker Aging Resources found on Quaker Aging Resources Quaker Aging Resources | Providing Spirit-Centered Information. This article was prepared by Sheila Sorkin, PYM, Aging Support Coordinator. This article is to provide support, resources and engage the aging community of the Philadelphia Yearly Meeting as part of the “To Brighten Your Day” series.
