Throughout our yearly meeting, individual Friends and Monthly and Quarterly Meetings are diligently working to make our communities more accessible for any and all who are impacted by disability. We are overjoyed to share that the Philadelphia Yearly Meeting will be offering two different support groups: a Disability Support Group for Friends with disabilities and a Caregiver Support Group for Friends who are caregivers of those with disabilities. These support groups are open to members and attenders of PYM who self-identify as having and/or supporting individuals with any kind of disability, physical or mental, visible or invisible.
[Read more…] about Creating Community: PYM to Offer Disability and Caregiver Support Groups
Counseling
Building Connections Through Grief, Loss, and Pastoral Care
On October 19th, Friends gathered at Chestnut Hill Friends Meeting for a Thread Gathering focused on grief, loss, and pastoral care. The day provided space for conversations about how meetings offer support during life’s difficult moments. Participants shared their experiences, noting that strong relationships help meetings respond when members are going through challenges.
[Read more…] about Building Connections Through Grief, Loss, and Pastoral Care
Exploring Thoughtful Planning with Compassion and Care
Discussing the stages of life is never easy, but it still remains one of the most essential acts we can offer both ourselves, our loved ones, and members of our meeting. The upcoming workshop, Creating Your Advance Directives and End of Life Plan, which will be one of the three at the Grief, Loss & Bereavement: A Pastoral Care Thread Gathering On October 19th, will provide a welcoming space for Friends to navigate this delicate subject. Participants will gain insight into critical documents, such as living wills and healthcare directives, that help ensure their values and wishes are honored. The facilitators, Susan W. Hoskins (Newtown Friends Meeting) and Susan K. Garrison (Media Friends Meeting), will lead a discussion on completing important materials, offering peace of mind to us and those we care for.
[Read more…] about Exploring Thoughtful Planning with Compassion and Care
Ways to Connect Before Sessions
Philadelphia Yearly Meeting has multiple October events that will provide ways to engage within our community before Fall Continuing Sessions. Three opportunities include fellowship of the thread gathering, a family-centered peace-building event, or the collective discernment over climate during a virtual threshing session. Each of these events offers a unique opportunity to engage with the PYM community and prepare ourselves spiritually for the work ahead. Whether you are seeking fellowship, family engagement, or discernment on critical issues, these events will help ground us as we come together as a faith community:
Friends Counseling Service: Key Questions Answered for Accessible Mental Health Care
The Friends Counseling Service (FCS) serves members and attenders of Philadelphia Yearly Meeting (PYM) who are in search for guidance, comfort, and assistance. This service offers accessible mental health care to Friends across PYM with counselors providing individual therapy, couples counseling, and family therapy sessions. We connected with Janaki Spickard Keeler, Friends Counseling Service Coordinator, who provided additional insight into the service by answering some key questions.
Supporting Children and Teens After Violence in the News
How do we talk to children and adolescents about gun violence and senseless tragedy? Parents and caregivers are helping their children process their feelings alongside their own, and signs of anxiety are different in children and adolescents when compared with adults. Pastoral care for children begins with pastoral care for their caregivers, and the resources below are offered to support parents and caregivers, educators, and Friends who care for and work with youth. A concern about election violence led to the creation of this event in October for families — Peace Begins with You: A Gathering for Children & Families — and we hope you will share this community gathering and the resources below with your meeting.
Processing in Developmentally Appropriate Ways
Children and teens will have different exposure to and understanding of violent incidents, and may feel anxiety, confusion, fear, sadness, or anger, and have questions about what they see and hear in the media and from friends. Children cannot always articulate their feelings, and they may show us how they are feeling through play or behaviors. Their anxiety may show up as: anger, negativity, difficulty sleeping (particularly falling asleep), defiance, and lack of focus. For adolescent youth, symptoms of anxiety may include recurring fears and worries about routine parts of everyday life, irritability, trouble concentrating, withdrawal, and complaints about stomachaches or headaches.
* Some practical advice for parents and caregivers
- Parents and adults need to first deal with and assess their own responses to crisis and stress.
- In PYM, adults seeking support can reach out to the Friends Counseling Service.
- Try and keep routines as normal as possible. Children gain security from the predictability of routine, including attending school.
- Be present. Listen to your children’s fears and concerns.
- Depending on their age, limit exposure to television and the news but be honest with kids and share with them as much information as they are developmentally able to handle with simple, honest answers.
- Reassure kids that the world is a good place to be (individuals are responsible for violent actions).
- Reaffirm attachments and relationships.
Resources for Adults Supporting Children and Teens
- Spiritual Practices for Use During a Traumatic News Event from Traci Smith
- Talking to Children About Gun Violence from Everytown for Gun Safety
- Talking to young children about community violence from Sesame Workshop
- Talking to Children About Violence: Tips for Families and Educators from the National Association of School Psychologists
- Helping your children manage distress in the aftermath of a shooting from the American Psychological Association
- Isaiah and the Worry Pack — Learning to Trust God with All Our Fears by Ruth Goring
- A Kids Book About Anxiety by Ross Szabo from the “A Kids Book About” series. The inside covers suggests, ”This book is best read together, grownup and kid.”
Making Faithful Practices Available
Children need us to hear their concerns, and we can provide reassurance even if we do not have answers. Lifting up our worry and anxiety in prayer is another way to acknowledge those feelings and place them in the care of our Quaker faith. These coloring pages “Prayers For When You Feel Anxious” includes both suggested prayers and three different sets of images for mindful coloring. This lesson plan about meeting for worship suggests that our worship as Friends is a container that is strong enough to hold big feelings —even hard ones—and the lesson could be adapted to help process recent events and heavy hearts, alongside encouragement to continue finding the Light in our world.
Election Violence Prevention: Youth Programs
The guidance below for “Youth Programming” comes from Friend Emily Provance (a traveling minister from New York Yearly Meeting) and the Election Violence Prevention series she has created.
Featured strategy: Youth Programming
What the strategy means: There are three ways to approach this strategy: (1) encouraging teens and young adults to engage in the political process nonviolently, (2) empowering teens and young adults as leaders in the nonviolent movement, and (3) holding peaceful social events for teens and young adults during “flashpoint” moments, such as the day of an election or inauguration. How this strategy prevents election violence: Young adults and teens are often perpetrators of election violence, but this is often because older people have intentionally encouraged them to be violent. Empowering youth to take and even lead nonviolent actions means that they are much less likely to be convinced that violence is their best avenue for change.
Action Steps:
These are things that you can do to enact or promote election monitoring and mapping. Which one sounds like a good match for young people you know, and for you?
- For shepherd people (gifted in leading or organizing groups): Create or visit a youth forum, small or large, of teens and young adults. Support them in learning about and actively practicing nonviolent strategies for the political changes that they want to see.
- For relationship people (folks who are good at conversations and making friends): Ask some young people for their thoughts about the upcoming election cycle. Engage in conversation. What do they believe is likely to happen? How does that feel? Do they have concerns? Do they have ideas for action?
- For word people (talented writers and/or speakers): See if you can find a high school or university class or club to which you can speak about the election cycle and ways to engage in political change nonviolently.
- For prayer people (spiritual grounded intercessors): Pray for young people in particular throughout the election cycle. When the opportunity arises, invite young people you know to pray actively for nonviolence.
- For motion people (naturally physically active doers): Consider holding a sports tournament on a Saturday or several weekends in a row. During breaks and over snacks, talk about the election cycle and the influence young people can have on nonviolence in their communities.
- For learning people (research ninjas and data analyzers): Find out what, if anything, your local schools are teaching in terms of voter and civic education.
- For creative people (artists, musicians, performers, and crafters): Find an opportunity to hold a creative workshop of some sort for young people, either by organizing a group or by being a guest artist for an existing group. Use election violence prevention as your theme.
Image: Pixabay.com
Monthly & Quarterly Leadership Gatherings – January 2023
Three times a year, Christie Duncan-Tessmer, General Secretary, invites PYM Friends in monthly meeting and quarterly meeting leadership roles to attend gatherings on Zoom. Over 100 leaders attended one or both of the January 18 and January 25, 2023 events, gathering for sharing, listening, and learning. [Read more…] about Monthly & Quarterly Leadership Gatherings – January 2023
Long Term Care & Hope
Planning for retirement includes many considerations. Quaker Aging Resources offers information and links to articles on a variety of topics, listed below. The website was designed 10 years ago to assist meetings, individuals, and families in responding to the needs of aging Friends including age related changes, chronic illness, or disability. The pamphlets and resources are intended to uphold a culture of care for the body, mind, spirit and community of the individual which is consistent with Quaker faith, and address the following needs: [Read more…] about Long Term Care & Hope
Make Your Gift to PYM Count for our Worship & Care Package
A family who loves our faith community has given PYM a $30,000 challenge gift. This gift will support a package of worship and pastoral care offerings for PYM and our meetings. It’s a care package of worship and pastoral care – a Worship & Care Package! [Read more…] about Make Your Gift to PYM Count for our Worship & Care Package
Supporting Children and Teens After Violent News
In the last two weeks we have been repeatedly confronted with the legacy of gun violence and ongoing, communal trauma in this country. The three events in recent days have happened in the kinds of everyday places that should be safe — the grocery store, church, and school. How do we talk to children and adolescents about gun violence, racialized violence, and senseless tragedy? Parents and caregivers are helping their children process their feelings alongside their own, and signs of anxiety are different in children and adolescents when compared with adults. Pastoral care for children begins with pastoral care for their caregivers, and the resources below are offered to support parents and families—please share.
[Read more…] about Supporting Children and Teens After Violent News
