Introduction:

I have only ever heard of this game as played by Quakers. Quakers in Britain, where they call it "Screwdriver"; New England and Maryland, where they call it "Bloody Winkum"; Pennsylvania...but I've never found it played by non-Quakers. see letters to the contrary I think this is priddy cool: us Quakes have this great insane esoteric activity that nobody else does. Maybe Wink is a sort of subconscious Quaker letting-out-violence thing. Hey, we're pacifists--how else are we gonna do it?  Why not use some game that's a cross between spin the bottle and wrestling? On this same tangent . . . anyone ever wonder why Quaker boys are so sword-obsessed? But I digress! Carrying on. . .

Okay kids, you wanna play Wink?
Are you sure?
Well, okay, but don't say I didn't warn you.

Roight (said in Monty Python tone of voice)! First you will need several rather silly people who don't mind rug burn (preferably, Young Friends).


It must be an odd number of people. Got that? Okay. Now, have them all choose a partner, except for one person, and have them decide upon who sits in the front and who sits in the back:

Now have all the sets of partners form a circle:

The person left over from the partner choosing is known as the "Winker". He or she should sit alone, usually cross-legged, and not obscured by anything:

The Winker then chooses three sets of partners (sometimes more, occasionally less, depending on how many people you're playing with, never less than 2, rarely more than 4). The front partners in these three sets must try to get to the Winker and kiss them (on the cheek is usually the easiest way to go, but anywhere on the head will work). The back partners must try to stop the front partners from doing this.

When the Winker is finally kissed, the kisser becomes his/her partner, and the kisser's old partner becomes the new Winker. Thus the circle of Wink continues. However, the Winker must be rather brave...having several people trying to kiss you at once may be quite the ego boost, but also can be rather traumatic.

Rules Printable pdf of Rules

There are a few rules which should be observed:

1. Rules must be explained before every game.

2. There must be at least 2 Friendly Adult Presences (Chaperones) present.

3. No jewelry or belts with buckles. No piercings or glasses. No shoes.

4. No grabbing clothes. No tickling, no biting. No grabbing or holding the neck including headlocks. No violent kicking, smacking, punching or other hitting. Be mindful of breasts and testicles. Covering the mouth is ok, but Make sure you allow your partner to breathe.

5. For everyone who knows how to wrestle: no wrestling moves with names allowed

6. Always pay attention even when not wrestling. Try to stay within boundaries of the circle.

7. "Ow" means "ow" (ask what’s wrong), stop means STOP! If you hear stop, yell it again.

8. Before being called, both partners must have two cheeks and two palms on the ground. You may not be touching your partner before they’re called.

9. In smaller games the pairs on either side of the winker may not be called, if the game gets larger we may choose to move to two or three pairs away.

10. When calling pairs, point AND say either their name or an identifying feature about them such as shirt color, or hair color. Don’t call them by a feature that can’t be seen by the person behind them such as shirt logo.

11. Winkers should try to remember who has gone often and try to call on those who haven’t been called on.

12. Call two pairs first. Maybe 3 in a larger game

13. Only the people who have been called may attempt to kiss the winker or stop others from kissing the winker.

14. If pairs have been called and have been winking for a while without success, the winker may call another pair.

15. You must remain on your hands and knees whenever winking.

16. You must kiss the winker on the head, but there is no grabbing the winker at all.

17. When the winker has been kissed, the winker and the kisser yell over. When you hear over, yell it again so that everyone hears that the game is over.

18. At all times try to remember to be aware of your partner and the others around you- try to AVOID injury, and HAVE FUN!!


A special Thanks to Alice Rutherford for creating this page

I found various descriptions of Wink in old games books, one from 1909 and one from 1940.  The 1940 version has the clearest description but both were clearly describing the same playing style.  -Cookie

Wink 1940
This is an old timer. In the writer's boyhood days this was one of the favorites. A party was hardly complete without it. Chairs are arranged around the room with a man behind each chair. In all but one of the chairs set young ladies. Each man keeps his hands on the back of his chair, except when trying to prevent the lady sitting there from leaving him for the winker. The man with the empty chair makes an effort to get a partner. This he does by winking. When he winks at a lady she must immediately make an effort to get up and move to his chair. The man in whose chair she is sitting tries to prevent her from getting up. If he puts his hands on her shoulders before she arises she must stay. The winker keeps at it until he succeeds in getting someone's partner.

from The Fun encyclopedia, E. O. Harbin, Abingdon - Cokesbury Press, New York & Nashville
page 160.

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June 13, 2007
Elizabeth P. Schmidt (one of the faces in the picture at the top) informes me that this Philadelphia Young Friends website with game rules is referenced in the Wikipedia free online encyclopedia Wink (Game)

1/18/2007
I received this e-mail from a camper at Camp Galilin near Camp Onas in Ottsville, PA.

Wink is also quite popular at my Jewish camp in rural PA! I knew we were near Camp Onas geographically, but I keep finding out more and more things we have in common!
Sara

I have received several letters from Unitarian Universalist kids like the ones below, saying how they play Wink at their gatherings -Cookie

10/13/2004
i'm a Unitarian Universalist kid, and i just wanted to let you know that my and my friends (and every other UU kid i know of) have been playing wink since forever. and on your site http://www.pym.org/youngfriends/Pages/wink.htm it says wink is only played by quakers, so i just wanted to let you know that UUs play too.
thanx
jAMES cARP

8/28/2004
Hi,
My name is Maia and I loved your Wink page. I just thought you would be interested in hearing that another religious organization has caught on to this awesome game! That would be the Unitarian Universalists. Somehow Wink was spread to us and now most Unitarians know how to play it ..thanks for such a great game!

~Maia

P.S.If you have any other great Quaker games we should know about, be sure to pass the word.

[*WINK*] Sitting, waiting… The tension watered down By “Ummm”s and “Errr”s, but still Tangible, like the carpet beneath me. Suddenly, a name! Mine?! In a flash she is on me. The room erupts, people screaming. We struggle furiously, the carpet Abrading knees and elbows alike. I roll, inching closer; the shouts Around me continue, some people Cheering me on, others pulling For her and others in the fray. Squirming to free my leg, I see How close I am. In one final Stretch, I extend my being, and In one perfect kiss, it is "OVER!!!" -Hilary 12/29/2005

 

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